The short answer: Opinion.
The longer answer is inspired by Tim Grahl, the CEO of Story Grid.
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Flat sentences are your enemy.
Rewrite a flat sentence with an opinion. Every single one of them.
Here’s an exercise:
Take a plain sentence like...
“The man sat down in the chair.”
Rewrite it with opinion… 10 times.
Make it less boring, less like a report, and more interesting.
Need ideas?
Here are my 10 opinionated sentences:
The grandpa plopped onto a wobbly piece of plastic.
His father dozed off and woke with an aching back due to the lack of a tail prop.
He hit his head when he realized it was a stool. (this could be a bit tricky to identify as a reader, because I want to say that he wanted to sit down, but the lack of a back support made him fall on the ground, hitting the back of his head)
The doctor sought sedentary relief after a 12-hour savage slice.
He smashed the chair when he learned his son was gay. / He lost faith in his son when he told him that he was gay, and his attempt to sit down smashed the chair into pieces.
Hand shaking, he approached the armrest, shocked by his son’s news. / His hand was shaking when he approached the armrest attempting to recover from the shock of having lost his son to another man.
Uncle George slumped into the nearest wooden chair. / Uncle George staggered into the next piece of solid wood that gave his restless soul some quiet.
How could the bartender know sitting would trigger his hemorrhoids? / How could the bartender know that a sedentary lifestyle would reactivate the quiet thorn in his flesh’s recline?
My husband fainted and crashed into my wheelchair. / My husband lost his consciousness and crashed into my wheelchair.
Papa never woke up once his back found peace. / Papa never opened his eyes again once this rump found peaceful rest.
Do you see how I’m delivering my view through words, tone, and arrangement?
Now YOU.
Take a pen and a piece of paper.
Write down “The man sat down in the chair.” and GO!
Rewrite it ten times with an opinion.
What did you come up with?
Share your 10 sentences with me.
This is a fun exercise. Don’t stress if your prose isn’t world-class. Mine is neither.
The goal is to “un-boring your writing,” as Tim says.
A WARNING: I enjoy different views but don’t marry a POV till the day I die (I only want one wife). I carry an opinion until it no longer serves me or it’s proven wrong. So let’s not fall for the “me versus you” mindset that’s been infiltrating even the sharpest of minds. Let's stay united (yet individual in the way we express ourselves). Division is the source of all evil.
Talk soon,
Alexander "a little re-writing party never hurt nobody" Kluge